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Mind Your Own Business

By Pamela Jett, CSP

It is a myth that good work gets rewarded.  The reality is that good work alone is not enough to experience success.  Several years ago a participant in one of my workshops shared the following:

Pamela, I work so very hard.  I am always on time.  I don’t waste time chatting and gossiping.  I come in, I get to my desk, and I get to work.  The numbers prove that I get more work done than any of my colleagues.  They seem to waste time going to lunch with people, participating in extra activities, and, in general, seem to brag about what they get done.  I am frustrated because others seem to be getting promoted and I, the top producer, am stuck – it’s not fair.

While I could understand this person’s frustration, it was also clearly evident that she bought into the myth that good work alone is enough to get ahead.  The reality is that while good work is a first step towards getting attention, authority, and opportunities, good work must be leveraged with good career management communication skills.

Top notch professionals recognize that it is their responsibility to “mind their own business.”  They recognize that it is not their leader’s responsibility to know and track how valuable they are, it is their responsibility to communicate their worth and value.   They use powerful communication skills to leverage their contributions and increase the likelihood that this good work gets noticed.

One simple way to communicate your value is to replace the words “idea” and “suggestion” with more powerful words such as “solution” or “plan”.  People will pay more attention to a “solution” than they will to an “idea” or a suggestion. This is a small change that can make a big difference.  And, if you really want to communicate your value, make sure you put your contributions in writing (even if you present them to a group).  This increases the likelihood that you will get the credit you deserve when your solution yields great results.  Additionally, people will take you more seriously simply because you took the time to put your contribution in writing.

If you are looking for more powerful communication tools to “get noticed” and “get ahead”, join me on February 4, 2010 at noon PST for a powerful one-hour teleseminar to help you “Mind Your Own Business.”  Can’t join the live event?  If you register, you will receive a download to listen to at your convenience.  Register here: https://secure.confertel.net/tsregister.asp?program=Jett2010 An audio CD version is also available at http://www.jettct.com/success-store

If you have a great suggestion on how to “Mind Your Own Business” that you believe will help others experience career success, please leave a comment.  I would love your suggestions!

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Posted in Professional Development, Uncategorized, communication on February 2nd, 2010 by pamela

It’s “Just” a Word

By Pamela Jett, CSP

I had a conversation recently with a good friend of mine who is parenting a fantastic 16 year old son.  He is a great kid, a stellar student, a gifted athlete, and well liked by his peers.  He does, however, pressure himself to be a “superstar” at everything and sometimes that self-imposed pressure creates nerves or jitters, especially on the basketball court.

In a well meaning attempt to ease the pressure her son has imposed on himself, my friend tries to remind him that “it is just a game.”  After she shared this with me, I asked her “are you open to some feedback?”  (Unsolicited advice is the worst kind, in my opinion.  So, I wanted her permission or “buy in” before sharing my thoughts.)  Here is the gist of what I shared with her.

The word “just” is a minimizer.  For example, “I’m just an administrative assistant”  sounds weak and self-demeaning.  Whereas “I’m an administrative assistant” sounds confident and capable.  I was concerned that by telling her amazing son that it is “just a game” she would be unwittingly sending a message to him that basketball isn’t very important, ought not to matter, and that she as a parent doesn’t place a lot of value on something that he clearly deems important.  For her son, such a message could be devastating.  She agreed and together we worked to craft a message that would still honor the importance basketball holds for him while not adding pressure to perform or succeed.

It’s “just” a word – right?  It’s just one small word that can completely change the tone of a message. Words matter and the words we choose to use and the words we choose to lose can make all the difference to our career (and our parenting) success.  I challenge you to monitor your use of the word “just.”  Use it sparingly.  Use it wisely.  Consider if using “just” adds to your credibility or detracts from it.  Ask yourself if using “just” might send a belitting or demeaning mesage (albeit unitention as in the case of my friend.)  Using “just” is a habit we can break.

If you have situations where you have found “just” to be a minimizer, please share them with me.  Post a comment, subscribe to this blog, and share with your friends and colleagues.

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Posted in Parenting and communication, Professional Development, communication on January 25th, 2010 by pamela

What is a Communication Skills Speaker?

By Pamela Jett, CSP

As a communication skills expert, I am often asked what exactly does a communication skills speaker do?   The answer is fairly simple, I work with individuals, organizations, teams, associations, and groups to improve their productivity by improving communication.  I am fond of reminding people that “communication is like a thread which runs through a pearl necklace.  It is invisible.  Yet without it, everything would fall apart.”  I firmly believe that communication is the most important skill set any professional possesses.  Good communication (or poor communication) can make or break a career, a team, a family.  Most professionals agree that about 80% of problems at work result from poor communication and most individuals will admit that poor communication is the root cause of many relationship breakdowns.  We all know that communication matters!

However, while most of us are aware that good communication is vital to success, many of us choose to learn our communication skills through trial and error.  Essentially, we are enrolled in the “school of hard knocks” when it comes to improving our communication abilities.  And the “school of hard knocks” comes with a pretty hefty tuition bill:  lost credibility, damaged relationships, lost opportunities, and team dysfunction.  Savvy people recognize that while the “school of hard knocks” is a valid way to learn, it can be painful and they prefer to learn from the knowledge and expertise of others.  As a communication skills speaker, I provide an alternative to learning the hard way.

With workshops, training, keynote addresses, executive coaching, teleseminars, audio CDs and other delivery mechanisms, I teach individuals powerful tools for communication success.  I believe that “words matter” and that the words you choose to use and the words you choose to lose can make all the difference.  For example, I teach my clients to stop saying “don’t forget” and to start saying “please remember”.  You can read other blog posts here for more examples of the specific tools and techniques that I share.  I provide professionals with specific language patterns and templates they can use to communicate effectively in some of the most challenging situations.  With a focus on practical application (as opposed to theory – because while interesting, theory really doesn’t yield results), I provide individuals, teams, and leaders with the words to use so that we no longer lay awake at night wondering “how do I deal with that?”  or “what do I say”.

I enjoy being a communication skills speaker immensely.  It is very rewarding to have someone say to me “I tried your technique, and it worked!”  I would like to hear from you, so please post a comment.  Specifically, I would like to know what types of communication challenges do you face?  What types of conversations do you dread?  That way, I can post specific tools to address your specific needs.

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Posted in Difficult Conversations, Leadership, Professional Development, Relationships, Uncategorized, communication on January 20th, 2010 by pamela

Vision for 2010

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By Pamela Jett, CSP

As promised in my my last blog, I’ve attached a picture of one of my vision boards for 2010.  It has been my practice for several years to create two vision boards; one for my personal life and one for my professional life.  The picture is of my personal vision board.

For 2010 I replaced last year’s theme of “joy, balance, and abundance” with a new theme of “clarity, action, and connection”.  It is my vision that 2010 will be year when I not only have a clear vision of what I want to do, but that I also focus on taking action with the end result being greater connection spiritually, socially, physically, and mentally.

It is not too late to create your own vision of what you want your life to be like in the up-coming year.  Creating a vision board not only helps you discover what you want your life to be like, it serves as a visual reminder all year long. There is no right or wrong way to create a vision board.  Many people use pictures from magazines and create a collage.  Others create a combination of words and pictures.  This year, my vision boards are completely free of pictures and just have key words and phrases arranged in a way that makes sense to me.  They are both hanging prominently in my office as I write this blog.

I would love to see your vision boards or learn what is working for you.  Leave a comment and let me know what your vision is for 2010.  I wish all my readers a very happy and prosperous new year!

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Posted in Professional Development, goal setting, life balance on January 4th, 2010 by pamela

2010 – RESOLVED!

By Pamela Jett, CSP

It’s that time of year again.  The time when most of us, myself included, engage in introspection, goal-setting, and making resolutions for the new year.  As I was watching the morning news today I noticed there were numerous segments focusing on creating a better physical self in 2010.  And while losing weight, getting in shape, and improving nutrition are certainly worthwhile goals (they are part of my vision for 2010), I also believe it is worthwhile to focus on the other parts of ourselves, specifically our heart and head.

So, while I certainly want to drop a few of the pounds I somehow managed to gather in 2009 (OK, it’s not a big mystery – I didn’t move enough to counter the calories), I also want to work on dropping some of the emotional weight I accumulated.  I am spending some time this week examining my heart to determine if there is any guilt, fear, or anger that might be weighing me down that I can process through and eliminate in 2010.

Just as many people resolve to begin more healthy habits such as healthier eating and a fitness regime, I want to examine my mental habits.  Where am I spending my time?  Am I engaging in any counter-productive habits (too much watching silly television shows when I could be feeding my brain interesting and useful information for example?) Are there time-wasting behaviors I can eliminate just like many of us eliminate junk food?  Can I replace these habits with new more mind-healthy behaviors?  Who am I spending my time with?  Are they people from whom I can learn and grow?  These are the types of questions I am asking myself this week.

What about you?  As you resolve to be a better version of yourself in 2010, I challenge you to not only focus on your physical self, but to focus on your “whole self”.  Look for ways to grow and improve physically, mentally, spiritually.  Once you have clarity on what you want to achieve, you can use the tried and true goal-setting techniques and vision board approaches.

I’ll spend this week in introspection and then I will create my vision boards for 2010.  I’ll blog about that process soon and post pictures as well.

I would love to know what heart and head resolutions you are making this new year.  Leave a comment and let me know.  Here’s to an abundant and prosperous 2010!

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Posted in Professional Development, goal setting, life balance on December 29th, 2009 by pamela

Trigger Understanding – Not Defensiveness


by Pamela Jett, CSP

The other day I was having a conversation with a good friend who was expressing some relationship frustration.  During our conversation she mentioned that she often felt he was condescending to her just like someone who regularly says “do you understand?” during a conversation.
This got me thinking.  As good communicators, we are taught to check for understanding so that we can ensure that we have been understood in the way we intended.  Unfortunately, if we regularly ask our conversational partners “do you understand?” it can trigger defensiveness or hostility.  When we frequently use that for perception checking we might inadvertently cause others to think we believe they are stupid or somehow just not getting it.  So, what can we use instead to check perceptions?
I would suggest trying more open-ended questions such as:
  • What are your thoughts?
  • How does that impact you?
  • What, if anything, can I clarify?

Obviously, which question to use is highly dependent upon the conversation you are having.  However, if you replace “do you understand?”, which is a closed-ended question, with an open-ended question you not only get better feedback, you are less likely to trigger defensiveness and more likely to have a healthy, happy relationship.

Pamela Jett is a communication skills expert, speaker, and author who believes that “words matter”.  She specializes in teaching professionals what to say and what not say in order to improve relationships.  For other great communication tools visit www.Jettct.com.
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Posted in Difficult Conversations, Professional Development, communication on October 13th, 2009 by pamela

A Hairy Leadership Issue

By Pamela Jett, CSP

In the course of doing some research for a current consulting/coaching client I ran across a very interesting piece of research. Apparently there is a statistically significant correlation between the side (right or left) of the head men and women choose for a hair part and their perceived leadership abilities. According to this rather wacky research, leaders who part their hair on the right were seen as less capable than leaders who part their hair on the left. Go figure.

My intent is not to send you rushing to the mirror (while I confess I took a quick peak at mine and yes, I am slightly to the right – oops!) Rather, I thought the research was an interesting case study in how minor things can often influence the perception others have of us. It is sometimes tempting to only pay attention to major issues when looking to increase our overall leadership and communication effectiveness. I have long held the belief that the average person pays attention to, and often works to improve, the major things. The professional who is willing to go beyond the major, the obvious, and the most common areas of development and look at minor things that can make a major difference is the professional who will stand out in a crowd of “average”.

So, what are you doing today to move your career, your business, your professionalism forward? Are you consciously looking for ways to improve, both major and minor? Do you engage in frequent self-analysis to look at what you ought to start doing, what you ought to stop doing, and what you ought to continue doing to keep yourself valuable to your organization or customer? As you move on a path of self or career-development, I would encourage you to look at the major and the minor things you can improve to make a huge difference in your career success.

Now, if you will excuse me. I’m off to re-style my hair!

If you have any examples of small changes that you have made to your communication that have made a big difference, I would love to hear from you. Drop me a note at Pamela@JettCT.com or post a response to this blog. For more information about developing remarkable communication skills for remarkable results, visit my website at http://www.jettct.com/.

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Posted in Leadership, Professional Development, communication on April 28th, 2009 by pamela

Economic Downturn and Professional Development

By Pamela Jett

At first glance, the phrases “economic downturn” and “professional development” likely don’t seem very congruent. However, I see it differently. I believe it is extraordinarily important during an economic downturn for individuals and organizations to be committed to professional development. The challenge is that during an economic downturn, many organizations and individuals may believe that professional development is a luxury they just cannot afford.

Knowledge is power and the more we know the better decisions we typically make, the quicker we are able to solve problems, the more creative we can be in thinking of ways to stimulate the bottom line. I believe there are really only two ways to gain knowledge.

One way to gain knowledge is in the “school of hard knocks”. By that I mean learning things through experimentation, through trial and error, by making things up as we go along (anyone currently enrolled?) While there is nothing wrong with learning from our own mistakes and experiences (in fact, some would argue, and I would agree, that there really is no such thing as failure unless we fail to learn) the “school of hard knocks” does come with a hefty tuition bill. We can make expensive mistakes, engage in career damaging decisions, and pay a hefty price in terms of our professional reputation and opportunity cost. All this is in addition to the actual “cost” (money, customer loyalty, etc…) a mistake or an error might incur. In challenging economic times, regardless of your current job status, can you really afford to learn things the hard way? I doubt it. I know that I can’t.

Which is why I am a HUGE advocate of the second way to learn things – through the knowledge, experience, and advice of others. I want to proactively tap into the resources that are available to me to help me get results without having to experience a steep learning curve. I genuinely believe this approach will help me work smarter. I will gladly part with some of my hard earned resources and my time to attend a workshop, listen to a podcast, or read a book if the end result is that I am able to put into practice tools that will bring more value to my customers or organization. I can’t afford to make a foolish error simply because I was neglecting my professional development and thought that attending a workshop was a luxury I couldn’t afford. I look at professional development as something I can’t afford to neglect at this time.

So, I’ve been attending workshops, meetings, conventions, listening to audios, reading books, and tapping into mentors like at no other time in my professional career. Yes, some of this costs money. Yes, it all takes my valuable time (opportunity cost.) And yes, I am confident I will see a return on my investment.

My question to you is, what are you doing today to make yourself more valuable to your employer or customer tomorrow? Are you actively acquiring new knowledge? Are you proactively seeking new information to help you solve problems and grow the bottom line? Are you focusing on fear or are you focusing on opportunity? Are you spending your valuable time and cognitive processes bemoaning the economy or are you accepting that we live in challenging times and focusing your energy and efforts on improving yourself?

If you could take every second, every minute, every hour of the last 30 days that you’ve spent discussing economic problems, listening to pundits repeat the bad news and point fingers and added them all up, how much time and energy would that be? How much more fruitful would that time be if spent on professional development? In challenging economic times, professional development is one luxury in which we can’t afford not to indulge.

Pamela Jett is a professional speaker who teaches remarkable communication skills for remarkable results to professionals around the world. She can be found at http://www.jettct.com/ . If you are interested in booking Pamela to speak at your organization or event, call Aimee at 866.726.5388. You can also follow Pamela on Twitter or join her on Facebook.

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Posted in Professional Development, communication, goal setting, stress managment on March 9th, 2009 by pamela

It’s Time to Work Smarter and Harder

By Pamela Jett

We are all familiar with the old saying “work smarter not harder” and for years I have been teaching professionals how to do just that. And then the other day I was having a conversation with a colleague that made me realize that in our current economic environment, that advice is not only trite, it is foolhardy. I believe at this time it is imperative for professionals, whether an employee, leader, or small business owner, to work both smarter and harder.What does that mean? I think it takes a combination of both smarts and tremendous effort and energy to stay so valuable to your organization (and/or your customers) that if and when downsizing or reorganizing impacts your organization; you will not be one of the first to be “voted off the island”. There is no such thing as job security and when times become tough, it is up to each of us to become even more proactive about our career development. Sometimes that means we must not only think strategically (that’s the “smarter” part), we must spend more effort and energy in implementation and/or take bigger steps out of our comfort zones to develop new skills, contribute in new ways, and take on new responsibilities (that’s the “harder” part). Here are three powerful ideas to help you work smarter and harder.

1. Know your leader’s pain (and their leader’s pain) and be a pain reliever. Every leader has his or her hot buttons or pet issues. They also each are under pressure from their leader to produce results. The savvy professional pays attention to the issues that cause the most stress or strain on their leadership and work very hard to leverage their contributions to ease their leader’s pain. We each have limited time in a day and while during tough economic times we might find ourselves working longer hours or taking on more projects, we also want to be cognizant of the value of each project. Are you proactively seeking ways to keep your plate full of high-leverage projects and responsibilities? Or, are you simply taking the assignments that are given to you? The savvy professional doesn’t wait for their leaders “pain” to be handed to them. They look for the pain (smarter) and work (harder) at finding ways to relieve that pain.

2. Make or save your organization money and brag about it. During tough economic times, most organizations (and customers) are taking a closer look at every dollar spent. And, they are paying very close attention to revenue streams. Regardless of your position in your organization, you have the opportunity to make or save your organization money. It is time to start focusing on that part of your job even more. That might mean being more proactive when negotiating with vendors, looking for alternative ways to accomplish more with less, or spending a bit more time prospecting to fill the sales funnel. When you make or save your organization money, it is imperative to brag about it. Now is not the time to be a shrinking violet or shy about tooting your own horn. Keep a spreadsheet that logs the money you are making and/or saving. Then, send your leadership regular up-dates. Be willing to speak up in meetings and share when appropriate. If you are waiting for others to notice your efforts, it won’t happen. They are far too busy managing their own career success to be focused on yours! Now is the time to speak up!

3. “Empty your pockets to feed your mind and your mind will feed your pockets”. This can be challenging advice to take during tough economic times. At a time when every dollar counts, many of us might be tempted to cut back on our personal investment in our skills and abilities. Perhaps you are thinking about returning to school for an advanced degree (smart and hard), but have decided to put it off (even though your organization currently compensates you for the much of the cost). Or, you have been thinking about buying some books with money from your own pocket to help you become more proficient with a computer program and you are hesitant to spend the money. While I am not advocating senseless spending or personal fiscal irresponsibility, I urge you to consider that now is not the time to be “penny wise and dollar foolish”. What if attaining an advanced degree is valued in your organization or on your career path? Having that degree might keep you employed or make you more employable in the future. Being more proficient with a computer program will allow you to be more productive and make a greater contribution to your organization. Yes, it can be hard to make the personal sacrifice and invest in yourself. However, in the knowledge economy (as opposed to a time/labor economy) in which most professionals work, your skills and abilities are really all you have to offer your current or future employer. Be wise, invest in yourself. Now more than ever, that is both smart and hard!

We are living in challenging times. Now is the time to work both smarter and harder. If you have suggestions on how to do this, I would love to hear from you. Drop me a note at Pamela@Jettct.com or comment on this blog. If you would like more ideas on how to advance your career, visit the success store at http://www.jettct.com/ to learn about Pamela’s powerful 4 audio CD series Mind Your Own Business – A Career Advancement System.

Pamela Jett, CSP is a communication skills expert who believes that words matter. You can find information about her including how to bring her to your next meeting or event when you visit http://www.jettct.com/. Or, you can call Aimee at 1.866.726.5388. By Pamela Jett

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Posted in Professional Development on October 18th, 2008 by pamela

"Phelpsian Feet" (Or Ought that to be Feat?)

By Pamela Jett

It seems that everyone is talking and blogging about Michael Phelps and his incredible feat (or ought that to be feet?) Like most people, I was so impressed by his discipline, his focus, his commitment, and his passion. It is so very easy to see applications to our lives as we work to achieve our goals and objectives personally and professionally. Much media was spent talking about the piece of paper he carried with him. No one had any idea what was on the piece of paper until after he won his 8th gold medal. He revealed that the paper simply contained his intention for the games “ to win 8 gold medals. What a terrific example of the basic principles of goal setting “ write your goals down and read them regularly. This increases the likelihood you will achieve them.

I was also intrigued by the media attention paid to Michael™s body type. He is essentially built for swimming; in particular he has long fingers and long feet. At one point, one of his team-mates used the term œPhelpsian feet to describe how Michael™s feet are one of the reasons he is so great.

This got me thinking about how each one of us has our own œPhelpsian feet. There is some skill, some talent, some strength, some unique skill or ability that each of us possesses. Are you using your œPhelpsian feet to your advantage? Do you know what your strengths are? Are you volunteering for projects or assignments that can allow you to use those strengths?

Part of being an amazing communicator is to know how to communicate your value and worth in the workplace. In previous posts and in many of my programs I talk about sending out œI™m great up-dates to keep your leaders in the loop regarding your contribution to the organization. It is so much easier to do this when you know your own strengths and you leverage those strengths to your advantage.

Michael Phelps is a great swimmer because he not only has the discipline to be great; he used his œPhelpsian feet to become great at a sport he was uniquely suited for. Could you imagine him trying to be a world-class gymnast? He might have had the same discipline and the same passion to succeed. However, I doubt he would have been world-class. He is simply not built for it. He is built to swim and to swim fast. I challenge you to discover your own œPhelpsian feet so you can experience tremendous feats of your own.

For more communication skills for success, visit Pamela on-line at http://www.jettct.com/. While you are there you can download free communication tools and assessments as well as watch clips of Pamela live.

Pamela Jett is a communication skills expert who believes that words matter. She works with organizations, associations and individuals who want to improve their communication skills for business and personal success. She can be reached toll free at 866.726.5388, at her website http://www.jettct.com/ , or Pamela@JettCT.com .

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Posted in Professional Development, communication on August 21st, 2008 by pamela

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